Wednesday, March 20, 2013

He's so gay!

Conversation between me & the girls the other night...
twin: He is sooooo gay!
me: gay? do you know what that means?
twin: yeah, it means if a boy acts like a girl
me: hmm no, not really? where did you hear that?
twin: this boy at school, everyone says that he acts like a girl, he talks like a girl & he thinks he is a girl, so they call him gay.
me in my head:       ::well hold on to him ladies cause he will some day be your bestie!!!!::
me: well, hmm how bout I tell you both the truth about the meaning of gay, cause your friends dont really have it right..
me:      ::deep breath, hoping i get it right::
me: sometimes, a person is born they have feelings like they like being with someone, they identify or like to hang around someone who is the same as them. A boy can like a boy & a girl could like a girl. they can fall in love & be together for a really long time, they may date for a short time, they could even get married.
twin: but they cant make a baby
me: no, but they can adopt a baby and can be a family
me: but they are gay and its part of them just like the color of your hair or the freckles on your nose (S) or the two different color eyes you have (C) Its very much who they are and not something to be made fun of, if you make fun of someone because of being gay, you are a bully. it would be the same as someone making fun of you because of the way you look. Its just part of who they are.
twins:       ::silence::
me in my head:       ::holy crap, i hope i got that somewhat right......but i think i did?!?!?::
twins:        ::more silence::
me: so what specials did you have in school today?

So this conversation has been one I have been waiting for.  My girls are official tweens, they will be 11 in a few weeks. We have had the discussions about body parts, changing, growing up & yes...."the birds & the bees".  This was the next phase of the dialogue, Dialog really never ends in my chatty house.  With two girls + me, its inevitable.  But I kinda like it that way.  Open dialog & honesty seems to always have worked for us.  My mom was always open & honest with me, I chose to parent that way also.  
My goal for my children is to teach them kindness, love, acceptance of all people.  Regardless of....well... anything.  It makes me sad that so many people are so divided on this topic.  I felt good about telling them the way I told them.

If I have lost friends because of this post, then that's sad.  If I have helped another parent with telling their child the same thing then great!  I never really know what direction I want this blog to go in.  I just felt really compelled to share this here.  Leave a comment if you'd like.